Bum

Yes I know it's the exams period. But it's just after EC1301! And how can I ever bring myself to study on a beautiful Saturday night?! Haha. Ok it's just an excuse for me to bum around coz I just feel like bumming around.  Alright EC was slightly harder than I expected, and made a few blunders here and there, and some of the questions were really weird. Oh well. I think I did decent so hope things turn out that way. Haha.

Anyway I received an email to ask me to get my CN2122 quiz from the CHE office. And so I did that without checking whether the CHE office was even open coz I totally forgot that today's a Saturday! And I peeped through the door (actually I don't have to do this coz the door was... clear -_-") and I saw the whole stack of papers at the counter! So near yet so far. LOL. Sian. Wasted trip. And I had to climb up the stupid hill for nothing. =( Anyway it's ok, lesson learnt. Exams can take place on Saturdays, but the offices are CLOSED.

I totally don't have the exam feel now. I just feel like bumming around... like I always do anyway. =D

Ok I think tomorrow's an auspicious day enough for me to start doing some Math for MA1505 on Tuesday.

YawnzZZ -_-"

Opportunities

Ok just came back from the Shell industrial visit yesterday. It's a timely break from my intensive revision and yeps, it was a really interesting trip. Or rather, it's really an eye-opener for me to see for myself what a real world-class petrochemical plant looks like. It's really.. wow. But yupz, I'm more motivated than ever to work at Shall after I graduate. And my choice in specializing in petroleum aka process engineering is the perfect choice for me. Suddenly, I can see that whatever I'm learning in school is of 100% use to me when I get out there to work in a chemical plant. Mass transfer, fluid mechanics, thermodynamics.. they are all like part and parcel of life working in a chemical plant. The common saying that whatever you learn in school is irrelevant once you get out to work is seriously not applicable to engineers. So technical, so exciting. Haha. And the working environment seems so enticing (ok not the ferry though... )! And in the last post I was somewhat questioning my decisions in life - I'm now very sure that the best decision I made in life is to take the leap of faith and choose chemical engineering over chemistry.

Sometimes, having too much opportunities creates headaches as well. All of a sudden, I feel like I'm flooded with tonnes of opportunity but I can't have everything I want. Maybe I'm being overly ambitious. I want to optimise my experience while I'm still in school, but at the same time, I'm doing things to restrict myself. Such an irony. But I really need to settle down after my exams to straighten out my thoughts - about what I want to do and what I have to forgo in order to those things that I want. One good example would be Industrial attachment. Should I sacrifice summer programme,  overload my overloaded semesters, and shorten my exchange just to go for it? So many things I have to consider. Sometimes it really helps to have someone experienced to talk to. I'm still not talking to my mentor because he's so rigid. Every time I try to request for some flexibility, he turns them down without giving a good reason, or even discussing with me. Yupz, so I have to find other avenues to do so. But yupz, I shall not bother too much about this now and just focus on my exams. Yikes! Econs this saturday! =(

Oh and one last thing. I'm done with my SEP application. Placed Imperial as my first choice and UIUC as my second. Hope I get it =D

Coming to the end...

Wow, it's been a good 1 month since I blogged. Haha. Life's been really busy, with the endless tutorials, essays and presentations to complete. WP is really sucking up all my time, which could be better used somewhere else, like brushing up on my CN modules. Haha, Anyway this semester's coming to a close really soon. All my lecturers completed their modules' syllabus already, so basically its like 2 weeks of reading week for me. BUT there's 2 upcoming presentations this week, one for WP tmr, and the other is for Matlab. Hmm.. Somehow I feel a bit too relaxed despite the fact that I have 2 presentations this week. (Actually I'm using the time for resting between rehearsals to type this.) -_-"

But yeps, this semester is ending but somehow I'm really worried for my grades. It's not that I did really badly for anything (ok, maybe one module.. =( ), but I'm just unsure if it's good enough? I'm not sure why I'm feeling this way, but it's just this great sense of uncertainty is getting on my nerves. I suspect its because my Programme Prof is giving me so many opportunities that I will really terrible if I screw my sem 1 up. Haiz. I dun like this feeling. It's actually making me question my choices in uni so far. Haiz.

What to do? Life still needs to go on.

Back to rehearsing my WP -_-zZZ

It's the weekends again!

Yet another week has passed. Nothing special happened in school. Life's as per normal. But this weekend, my parents started digging out old photos of my family and looking through those surprisingly well-preserved photos, it really brings back great memories of the past. I'm so amazed that they could actually find photos of my great great grandparents. Yes the photos are really old, but my parents got some photo guy to preserve it. It's in really good condition actually. And I'm actually very fortunate to at least get to know how the many generations above me look like. I came across this photo that really caught my attention.

Grandpa, me, my bro, grandma

As you can see the photo quality is not that good coz it's framed up and I took a photo of a photo with my camera. Haha. Anyway this one's especially meaningful to me. I don't know why but until now, I can still vividly remember what happened that day, which happened to be my 3rd birthday (duh, you can actually count the number of candles on the cake =X). Yupz, those were the really happy days, where I still have my grandparents dote on me like anything. They would buy me everything I wanted and never ever scold me! I can remember them hiding me whenever my parents wanted to cane me when I was mischievous. My grandma spoilt me with toys all the time, despite my parents opposing it. And she would tell me not to tell my parents that I got a new toy. Haha. It was really amusing. And even when my grandma was down with cancer, she never failed to prepare breakfast for me every morning before school. It was always a simple meal of egg sandwich and milo, but every meal was filled with nothing but warmth and love. And she would help me pack my bag and send me to school everyday and wait anxiously at the gate for my return.

And not forgetting my grandpa who would spoil me all the newest mobile phones and go around the entire neighborhood boasting about his grandsons. He would go walk around puffing a stick of cigarette while teaching me not to smoke. And he would also use some hokkien expletives while teaching me not to use them! Hahaha. Oh oh and nearing my A's he would randomly walk in my room and ask me not to study so much. Hahaha. His expression is always damn funny! Such an irony but I guess all the reverse psychology worked. =D

Until now, I can still remember their final words. And it was that they were really proud of me. It motivates me a lot - to know that no matter what I do and what choices I make, there's always these 2 fine people who will support me and feel proud of me. And I guess that's what kept me going no matter how tough things are. Thinking back, my grandparents played an ever so important role in my childhood. I really miss them.

Unfortunately, I realized that I stopped taking photos with my grandparents ever since I entered primary school. Such a pity. Looking through the photos, I really treasure each and everyone of them. Each holds an important memory from my past. As time pass, we begin to forget many things that happened in the past, and it's these photos that remind me of those precious moments. Lots of sentimental value. I realize that whenever it's nearing my grandma's anniversary that I begin to think back and reflect on my past.

One thing I've learnt over the years - Everything happens for a reason, and that one needs to go through the ups and downs in life to become a better person.

Damn, I feel so old each time I think of the past. Haiz.

Yupz, that's all for now. =D

Mid-Terms

This week's been a really long and painful week. Tuesday and Wednesday were when my midterms were held. Hmm.. What can I say about my midterms? I just feel very dissatisfied bah. First up's IT1005. Thought I did a totally shitty job, with my very limited knowledge and interest in computing. But turned out I didn't do too badly. MCQ section was surprisingly good! Hope I don't screw the second part too badly. CN2122 Quizzes were fine. But the midterms was painfully difficult with just 4 MCQ's worth a total of 100 marks. Ridiculous, but oh well. Hope I won't fail that. CN2121 was really disappointing. It's a really simple question but I thought to complicatedly. So yupz, so again, I don't expect much from this too, coz I myself ain't very convinced by my own calculations. Haiz. EC1301 was fine. Thought I did pretty well for that so hope that I can push on for the finals. Math was the most disappointing! I knew how to do all the questions but I lack confidence in my answers! So I changed my correct answers to wrong ones. SIAN. That's why I hate MCQ papers. WP2201H was rather disappointing too. The lecturer commented that my paper was well written, she couldn't give me a good grade coz there were tenses error! Not that serious one, but just some style that the lecturers generally do not agree to. So yupz, I got penalized a bit. But at least I know I'm the right track, so yupz, that's some consolation for me.

Overall, my CN and MA modules ain't doing too well, while my WP, IT and EC seems within striking range of my target. I could blame it on my insane exam schedule, but I choose not to. I feel that this time round, I was over-confident and didn't really prepare my work well. Left some doubts hanging in my core modules. So yupz, gotta really buck up if I want to hit my target. 

I was feeling terribly down throughout Thursday and Friday. I guess it's quite obvious when I suddenly act a bit anti-social and quiet. Yupz, I guess I need some time to get over the disappointment. But yupz, 01 therapy always works wonders. Haha. Met up with the 01 gang at NUS and went over to Airport to send Vincent off to London. I can never say anything logical and serious when I'm with them! I'm always full of crap and laughing till my jaws become sore.  And that's exactly what I need. To escape the seriousness of life in Singapore. Yupz, I guess going out with them help me forget all my disappointment and start fresh. Now, what I need is a good night's sleep. Tomorrow will be a new beginning for me. 

Ok after this round of midterms, the next important event would be to apply for SEP. I have a few choices in mind, but probably I would try to get Imperial College. Alternative choices are UC Berkley and UIUC. So yupz, see how it goes. Need to do my module mapping too. Lots of work to be done. 

It's gonna be a really busy next couple of weeks, and in no time, the final exams would be here! Terrible. I'm still constantly plagued by Matlab Lab Reports that take forever to do. Tutorials are getting more do-able for me, but new stuff is constantly being taught. University education is quite a challenge, but I guess consistent work is still the way to go. This midterms have been a really good wake-up call for me. So yupz, jiayou bah!

Term Break!

As the title suggests, it's the term break! But as the title doesn't suggest, is that it isn't actually a break. It's just a break from travelling to Clementi daily, but the studying continues with full force. Once the break's over, my midterms will come flooding in. The university isn't as nice to me as I would wish for. I have a total of 7 tests in 2 days. Awesomeness. I think I sort of break NUS's record of the most number of tests on a single day.
28.09.2010 - CN2122 Quiz 1 and 2, IT1005
29.09.2010 - CN2121, CN2122, MA1505, EC1301

The 29th is really a hell of a day for me. I've got papers spanning from morning to night. Terrible. How am I gonna survive?! Oh well. Life goes on even if I don't. *Choy!* Haha. Anyway the term break is really a good breather for me. Every week's always the same routine. Sundays and Wednesday nights are for rushing through the readings for my Food Politics, Tuesday and Wednesday nights for scrambling to get my Matlab Lab reports by Thursdays at 6pm and after all that trauma, wrecking my brains on a Thursday night to get tutorials done for Friday's 3 tutorials. I'm telling you it's no joke. After Friday's tutorial, I always feel this immense burden off me. Feels damn good. So I will go on to slack on Saturday. Then Sunday comes and reality strikes you again. Back to the same vicious cycle of never ending torture both mentally and physically. Haha. Just a word of advice, 6 modules for the first semester is not good, especially if you're not adapted to the environment yet. Really not much time to slack around, like during JC.

Anyway I have been pretty lazy these days. I have been ponning Math lecture and tutorials. Terrible indeed. Coz the Math lectures are always so out of the way. It's a total waste of time to wait in school for 3hrs to attend Math lecture! LOL. Yupz, but at least there's online lecture. So yupz, I can always refer to it when I'm lost. So yupz, these couple of days have been very much revision and catching up with my work.

These 2 books have been my best friends these days. -_-"

Oh and did I mention? Everything's going really well in my life except DRIVING! I think everything in life's about give and take. Maybe I have been blessed with possibly everything good in my life and it's time I get into sort of a set back. Oh well. I will try again someday. But it isn't my priority at the moment.

Recently, my parents have been talking to my bro and I about jobs and stuff. I guess reality really hits you when you're in the university. For me, it will be another 4 years before I head out to the workforce. But for my bro, it's only 1 year from now. It's really scary now that we're nearly leaving the comforts of school. Now for every decision I make, I have to think about practicality. Passion? Interests? Those suddenly become sort of secondary to me. Is it just me or everyone around me feeling the difference? Just take modules for an example. To take something coz it's easy and practical like Economics and Business, or take something that's practically useless to me in the future, but it's something I'm interested in, like Geography and Sociology?

To think about it, the reason why I chose Chemical Engineering is sort of a compromise between interest and practicality too. I loved Chemistry since JC as most people know, but studying Chemistry is just not practical since I'm sort of against research work. So, yupz, I chose something close to that instead, without knowing what I'm getting myself into. Now that I'm doing it already, I'm sort of relieved that I made such a choice. Yes, it's a highly competitive course, so much so that you can feel the tension even in lectures. However, I'm really liking what I'm studying! That's something I never really expected. I thought I partially gave up on my passion, but in turn, life rewards me by enabling me to find another field of interest. Really intriguing indeed. And I realised that one needs to experience setbacks to like something. Take for instance, I felt like crap attending the first few lectures and tutorials for Fluid Mechanics. But now that I took time really figure it out, I'm really beginning to love it. But on a side note, THERMODYNAMICS is still my favourite module so far.

So that's life for you. You can never predict how things will change over time, and as you go on, you get to discover many things that you may not even know of yourself. Interesting things about life. Ok, so that's all the updates for now. Perhaps I will get to stressed this week and I will start flooding this blog with my rants again. Yupz, so that's really all for now. =D

Week 4!

Ok end of another pretty tiring week in school. Damn i hate Wednesdays and Thursdays. Wednesdays are assigned to chionging Matlab reports and Essays for my writing module, while Thursdays are for all my other tutorials. Really lacking sleep during weekdays with the tonnes of work piling up. I can no longer work like during JC days, where I can do tutorials way ahead of time. So yupz, I need some time to adapt I guess.

Anyway things have been going on pretty smoothly in school. Had a Food Politics presentation on Thursday and it turned out pretty fun. I quite enjoyed the lively discussions that followed my presentation. That's the advantage of small class modules. And my peer review for my assignment (which constitutes 30% of my module grade) due on Monday is pretty decent, so it comforts me to know that I'm on the right track. Matlab report are fine so far so that's good.

Yesterday Prof Quek confirmed my module CN2122! The dean of engineering waived the pre-requisites for me and jiashen. Somehow I feel good doing the module now, although its quite a tough module to handle at year 1. Yupz, so yesterday after lecture went to settle some stuff with Dr Ti, the course lecturer. Really a lot of catch-up work to do this weekend because of the Fluid Mechanics module. Lot of tutorials to do and not to mention, I missed one pop quiz already, so he suggested a make-up quiz soon. So yah, have to study for it too. Sianz. So yesterday was really rushing all over the place to settle my admin stuff. Damn tiring running from EA to E5 to Central Library and back and forth quite a few times. Oh well but the issue is finally settled. A burden off my chest. Now to work extra hard to prove that I can do this module in year 1. But now I don't really know how to communicate with my mentor, coz he's the one that didn't allow me to take it at first. Haiz.

Anyway I was supposed to go for this IES Distinguished Lecture by Keppel CEO now with jiamei, vionna and zhiyang. But that stupid person didn't reply my email, so I didn't go in the end. Then jiamei messaged me just now saying that she saw my name there. LOL. Can't they just reply my email then I wouldn't have missed it. Oh well. Keppel's actually not that ideal for me too. So not that bad lah. But I'm still sticking with my ambitions and interest - Petroleum!

Ok so that's about the updates for now. Now, I treasure my weekends much more than during my Army days. Amazingly true. Oh and did I mention that the moment I cut my hair, I felt ten time more dumb. Haha. Damn Random. K tmr! =DDD